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SIMPLE SKIT

1st Gen

(2 people; 1 person starts on stage and the other in the audience)

PERSON 1:      So, our ministry does skits, obviously. That's what we're known for. And we probably have roughly 100 skits in our database.

PERSON 2:      (interrupts but doesn't leave seat in audience yet) Actually, if I may interject! We have way more than that! More like 300.

PERSON 1:      Okay, I guess you're right. We have closer to 300 skits. And all of our actors work very hard to learn parts in the skits. I myself know at least 1 part in probably half of them.

PERSON 2:      (interrupts again) Yeah, well I know like all the parts in all of them.

PERSON 1:      Are you seriously doing this right now?

PERSON 2:      Yeah, I am. (gets up and comes on stage) I am an amazing actor and know what I'm doing.

PERSON 1:      Well, let's prove it then. Let's do some improv skits for the audience. Right now.

PERSON 2:      Deal.

PERSON 1:      Alright, everybody. We need some suggestions from the audience if we're going to do improv skits.

(have the audience shout stuff out and just pick 1 or 2; incorporate those 2 items as actual improv into your skit)

PERSON 1:      Okay, so I heard (name 1 thing the audience shouted)

PERSON 2:      And I heard (name the other thing you picked from the audience), also someone said love. Alright, so let's do this skit.

(the two of you should pretend to discuss shortly what you'll do)

PERSON 1:      (drive a car onto the stage and run over Person 2's foot, park it there)

PERSON 2:      Aaaaaaa!

PERSON 1:      (walk around to other person) Hey, buddy!

PERSON 2:      You... you... you parked your car on my foot!

PERSON 1:      Oh! Let me move it! (get in car, try to start it but it doesn't work; get back out and walk back around to the other person) Well, I've got some good news and I've got some bad news.

PERSON 2:      What's the bad news?

PERSON 1:      My car won't start.

PERSON 2:      Oh no! What's the good news?

PERSON 1:      Well, the Bible says the joy of the Lord is our strength so if I tell you some jokes and you laugh, you might be able to just LIFT the car off your foot.

PERSON 2:      Okay, let's try it.

PERSON 1:      Okay, uh. What's red and bad for you teeth?

PERSON 2:      What?

PERSON 1:      A brick!

PERSON 2:      (laugh and then hold up right arm like strength just burst through it) Whoa! It worked! Do another one!

PERSON 1:      What's green and if it falls out of a tree it'll kill you?

PERSON 2:      What?

PERSON 1:      A pool table!

PERSON 2:      (laugh and then hold up left arm like strength just burst through it) Whoa! One more and I think I can lift this off!

PERSON 1:      What's brown and sticky?

PERSON 2:      What?

PERSON 1:      A stick!

PERSON 2:      (laugh and then act like you feel strength run through you; lift and throw car off foot)

(both of you watch the car fly through the air and then at the same time start making boom crash noises like it hit the ground)

PERSON 2:      Um, I've got some good news and I've got some bad news.

PERSON 1:      What's the bad news?

PERSON 2:      Your car is gone forever.

PERSON 1:      What's the good news?

PERSON 2:      Jesus is still on the throne.

P1 & P2:           (lift both arms to the sky) Praise Him! (bow out)

PERSON 1:      Alright, guys. Thank you! That was 1 skit but I think we need to do one more to prove our skill. Throw out some more suggestions.

(do the same thing as earlier with the suggestions from the audience)

PERSON 2:      Alright, this time I heard (1 or 2 suggestions).

PERSON 1:      Yeah? Well, I heard love from somebody over there.

PERSON 2:      Let's do this skit.

(skit is set up the same way. One person starts center and then other enters when the skit starts)

PERSON 2:      (act like you're standing on a train track and you're taunting the train) Come on train! Come at me train!

PERSON 1:      Hey! What are you doing?

PERSON 2:      I read in the Bible that no greater love has a man than this, to lay down his life for his friend. So I'm gonna lay down my life for you by taking this train to the face. So! Come on train! Come at me train!

PERSON 1:      No no! Don't do that! The train will kill you! Don't! (push them out of the way of the train and fall to the ground like the train hit you)

PERSON 2:      (the amount of bum-bum noises you make the other person will respond to until you stop with a final "caboose!") Ooooo! That doesn't look too good. I've got some good news and some bad news.

PERSON 1:      What's the bad news?

PERSON 2:      You're gonna need a chiropracter.

PERSON 1:      What's the good news?

PERSON 2:      Jesus is still on the throne.

P1 & P2:           (raise your hands in the air like you're praising God) Praise him!

THE END

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